Have I ever mentioned that time differences are weird... Skyeler is currently 15 hours ahead of me. So as I am typing this at 3 am it is 6pm there. (at least we are on the same day)
I am missing him like crazy... This go around has been easier but harder in many ways. I enjoy having Mikenas company but it is hard seeing Sky miss her and her miss Skyeler. I know she does. It isn't a ehhh I think she misses her daddy. SHE MISSES HIM! I will let her listen to our conversation on speaker and her whole face just LIGHTS up. She will instantly start cooing and babbling and then afterwards she gets a little bit fussy and I can't do anything to stop it. She wants her daddy. So cute but oh so heartbreaking at the same time. I hate it. I seriously tear up just thinking about it.
Another thing is that Mikena is attempting to be mobile and she got up on her hands and knees yesterday and was doing that bouncing thing. AHHHHHHHHHH. She can't do that yet. Skyeler is going to be so sad and disappointed if he misses it. He wants to be there so badly for her first everything. Hey crawling is a BIG milestone. I would hate to miss out on anything. I couldn't imagine being so far away and not being able to be there for it. I hope she waits just 2 more weeks. It is important to him... yeah yeah it is just a milestone there are other ones, and some are bigger... Who cares if there are others. He doesn't want to miss ANY! No matter how big or how small they are. He will see it when he gets home... True, but it isn't the first. He wants to be there for his daughter! Be part of her life and experience it with me. To see and feel each others excitement and have our relationship grow together as parents and husband and wife. This is our kid and she is growing and learning and doing so many new things. It is exciting. So really seeing it later or when he gets home he really misses out on so much more than just a milestone. So don't say it isn't a big deal. It may not be to others and you may not understand but don't make light of it.
Well that was some rant. Can you tell this is important. You never know how important something is or someone is until they are not there or you miss out on it. We had some amazing talks in Sacrament meeting today.... (I guess it was yesterday) But basically as humans we tend to make light, forget, or even belittle our blessings, things we have, and even the people around us because we get use to them and eventually they are not so special anymore. Every day is a gift. Everything we have are gifts. Our jobs, homes, clothes, basic needs, EVERYTHING is a gift. Yes we work hard for these things and are able to provide for ourselves but who gives us these opportunities. Who opens the door for us to get these jobs and promotions. Our Heavenly Father does. Everything we have comes from him and in our daily routines they become second nature and we tend to forget how blessed we are. To have a husband to cuddle with on the couch and to be able to have children who bless our lives. It is an amazing gift that doesn't seem all that amazing or grand when you have it every day and to take it for granted. To have your spouse away and having *LIMITED* communication really puts the special back into your thought process. You realize how blessed you are to have such a wonderful best friend to love and be with. I am a bit of a clean freak and I wish with all my heart that I could just have a messy house if it meant that my husband and best friend was home with me. I miss him so much and I hate being alone. But I am grateful for the little reminders on how important life is and for the empathy it gives me for others who's husbands are gone a lot longer or even whose husbands or wife has left this earth. How grateful I am to be part of this church and to have the blessings of forever. If a week without Skyeler makes me this miserable I don't want to imagine him passing on before me. I hope that I can live a life that makes my Heavenly Father happy and proud so that we can be blessed and be worthy of our sealing.
Oh boy you are getting a ton with this post. I better stop before nobody wants to read anymore. Guess this is what happens when I get woken up at 2 am for a 10 min phone call... I'll take what I can because 10 min at 2 am is better than nothing. Oh how I miss my best friend. But I am thankful for the opportunity to grow and learn things about myself and to become a better person, wife, and mother because of these experiences. So good early early morning, I hope you all have a wonderful day and don't take for granted the people who you have around you, because they might not always be there.
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