"Tomorrow, tomorrow, your only a day away!"

For about a month I haven't been able to think much of anything else (besides heading back to Utah) than what is going on in my life tomorrow. Tomorrow is Oct 16th and I have my 20 week ultrasound in Bethesda at the Walter Reed Army Medical Center. Ever since I made my appointment back in September I have been hoping and praying that Skyeler will be able to come with me. To me it is such a big deal that he is there. I have always in-visioned my husband coming to every OB appointment with me as we anticipate what will be happening next and just being able to allow our relationship to grow and become more close with our excitement in this adventure. But so far he has only been able to come with me once to anything and that was taking me to the E.R. to get my 2nd I.V.  So this has been far from what I have wanted. BUT....... luckily Skyeler's sergeant and instructors have given him the go-ahead to be able to come with me and to get out of class and for me to be able to drive him during the work hours. (I wasn't able to drive him to an eye appointment a couple months ago because he can't ride in a POV privately owned vehicle during the work hours). Again I hoped that this would happen but I never thought that it would because hey... it is the Army. So as of now it is just making sure Skyeler gets his name on a sick call list in his ACU's at 4:30 a.m. (Yes, they are that technical/picky that they have to be in uniform just in order to sign a sick call sheet.) I am a little anxious about him getting his name on that list because if he doesn't he can't go with me. Needless to say I have been a little worked up about everything going smoothly.

I am very anxious for this appointment tomorrow. I know that this are going well with the little one, but there is always this worry deep down that I can't shake. I constantly have to know that baby is ok, and I hate how my appointments are 6 weeks apart from each other. I want appointments at least every 4 just so I can listen to a heartbeat or something. I know that I have been able to start feeling baby move and baby has been throwing some harder ninja punches but if I am not feeling them constantly my worry starts up again. I am sure that is all very normal, especially after losing one. I don't think one ever really gets over that. I do know that it has effected this pregnancy. 

Wish me luck tomorrow... I can't wait to be comforted about how things are going and to have Skyeler with me. We don't know for sure if we will find out the gender or not. It all depends on baby and I still haven't decided when or how I will inform family. It has been really hard for me to be so far away and not get the feedback from family and friends in person. So even if we do find out, we might not say anything until the family is together in person for Christmas.